As far back as our history extends, we can identify the insatiable human desire to belong. A sense of belonging is fundamental for human wellbeing and happiness, our ability to survive the inevitable setbacks and heartaches life brings depends on our ability to both give and receive help, support and love. Belonging depends on interconnected communities and societies which intrinsically value individuals and their unique interests and contributions. Capitalism, by its very nature, judges an individual’s worth on the basis of their economic output, by default anyone who does not hold these values or cannot fulfil these expectations is less able to belong in a capitalist society. For this reason, capitalism and belonging are eternally at war.
Devastatingly, capitalism is no longer simply an economic ideology. The internalisation of capitalist values is shaping our cultural and social infrastructure, how we treat one another and how we perceive, judge and value ourselves. We are continually bombarded with messages that reinforce and purport the idea that the pursuit of self-interest is both acceptable and desirable. Paradoxically, through this approach to life, happiness is also unattainable. By promoting an unconscious internalisation of such values, the emotional need of human connection is fundamentally and continually undermined in favour of individualism, with devastating consequences for all of us.
Capitalism believes in the importance of activities which generate income and wealth, it is a system which depends on the need to indefinitely grow and expand. Despite the fact that this isn’t environmentally sustainable, due to obvious resource constraints, this ideology is disastrous for individual and collective wellbeing. The indoctrination of capitalist values begins as early as childhood. Schools openly identify ‘important subjects’ such as Maths and Science and then there are subjects such as art, music and drama, which are presented as ‘less important’ because they are considered to be less economically profitable. High achieving students are urged to pursue further study of ‘respectable’ subjects so that their talent need not be ‘wasted.’ We are obsessed with the idea of talent utilisation, as though an individual’s value is determined by their economic contribution alone. As early as childhood, our lack of belonging begins to manifest itself. Schooling which undermines self-expression and creativity that is not economically profitable is the first step toward teaching us that our interests are irrelevant. We are taught that belonging requires conformity. For those of us who do not conform, or cannot conform, we grow up with a lingering sense of isolation and feelings of inferiority and incapability.
As we grow, capitalist ideology continues to permeate our lives. Capitalism is obsessed with ruthless competition, we are taught the weak will be eliminated and the strong will survive. In capitalism there must be winners and losers, and so we start to believe life must be a competition too. Whilst competition may be effective to some degree in economic markets, once this belief transcends economic policy and begins to govern cultural attitudes, the effects are catastrophic. By internalising capitalist belief systems, we find it increasingly impossible to feel we are good enough for a society in which we will be continually judged and compared. Schools, universities and institutions which were historically created for human pleasure e.g. dance institutions and swim clubs, now utilise ranking systems to categorise students. Everyone is now obsessed with ‘excelling’ at their hobbies. It seems it is no longer acceptable to pursue interests simply because we enjoy them. They must be mastered, we must progress and continually ‘get better.’
The exponential growth of the social media industry, which is built upon the need for comparison, represents the disproportionate amount of money flowing to companies and organisations which sustain and uphold values of competition. The excessive level of competition between individuals, which is facilitated by social media sites, has continually been correlated with a decline in subjective wellbeing. Social media creates compelling fiction. If we do not have amazing careers whilst raising beautiful children, we are unsuccessful women. If we are not rich corporate men with six packs, who coach our sons’ football team on weekends; then we are inadequate fathers. If we don’t run marathons three months after giving birth, holiday multiple times a year and absolutely love our jobs, then we are failures. We are bombarded with personal advertisements of individual victories and told that if we are not happy all the time then we have made bad decisions and our lives are unfulfilling because we didn’t work hard enough. We are sold the illusion that hard work is the only variable in the equation. Except, it is never enough - we can never be enough. There is no acceptance left for ourselves because we could always be more productive, harder working, we could eat less, sleep less, socialise more, our waists could be smaller, our shoulders could be broader, we could earn more money and simultaneously have more time for our children. We could be better. Indefinitely.
We quickly learn that failure to meet such ideals will result in continual judgement by society, so we internalise the disappointment. We subconsciously reaffirm this is a society to which we cannot belong, because we are unable to satisfy the unrealistic and continually evolving standards fast enough. Worst of all, the competition isn’t fair; all the information we see is filtered, edited, and incomplete. Economics tells us imperfect information leads to market failure, except this time the outcome isn’t just inefficiency, it is a nation fighting against a mental health epidemic, there are crippling levels of loneliness and isolation, the rates of depression and anxiety amongst teenagers in the UK have increased by 70% in the past 25 years and suicide is now the leading cause of death for young people aged 20-34 (in the UK). A sense of belonging to a community and acknowledgement and appreciation of one’s personal identity are key determinants of wellbeing. As we shift towards excessively competitive societies and away from a culture that promotes self-worth and human connection, we are increasingly unhappy. We are being encouraged to trade in our compassion for one another and ourselves in favour of ‘personal growth’, but in the end we are all losing.
The capitalist mindset has not only distorted our perceptions of ourselves, but also our judgements of others, leaving us unable to develop the meaningful human connections we so deeply desire and need. It is disheartening to see that decisions regarding personal relationships and our interactions with others are increasingly focused on the ‘benefit’ others add to our lives. Yesterday a friend sent me a quote from an Instagram page (with millions of followers); it read ‘Don’t hang around with sad people if you want to be happy. You are the average of your five closest friends. Choose happy, successful and beautiful people.” It is impossible to put into words how superficial such posts are, yet they are glorified and cherished by millions of people every single day. At points in our lives we may be described as having all of these positive qualities, at other points, none of them. Are people only important insofar as their ability to be of immediate value to us?
People talk proudly of having ‘upgraded’ from their ex partners, of having ‘gotten rid of’ a toxic person, as though others are possessions we can find and be rid of without concern and without compassion. We flick through Tinder profiles as though we are skimming pages of a shopping catalogue. If we begin to view others as a means to an end (our happiness), then inevitably we will perceive ourselves as meaning to others nothing more than the same. The transcendence of this self-interested economic ideology into an acceptable approach to our personal lives and relationships, is one of the most frightening and tragic developments in our society. We may end up with a string of happy experiences but an underlying sense that we cannot truly belong. Our ability to belong is increasingly rooted in conditions which cannot be satisfied indefinitely. Eventually we all fall short in some way and the isolated and inauthentic lives we lead leave us extremely vulnerable and exposed in navigating this inevitable failure.
Of course capitalism may not be solely responsible for these problems; there is the argument that these are inherent human characteristics that make us self-interested or individualistic. However, there is no denying that capitalism supports and promotes an attitude of self-interest rather than challenging it. Capitalist culture legitimises a disregard for the fundamental value of individuals; we are taught that we are nothing more than our contribution and that such a view is acceptable and normal.
When we are continually subject to external judgements of our worth – economically, culturally and in personal relationships with others, we begin to internalise such judgements. A continual and perpetual plague of questions haunts our decisions. Are we beautiful enough, talented enough, intelligent enough or rich enough? Can we truly ever find lovers who will commit to us if we aren’t always happy? Will others like us if we are unsociable? Eventually we come to learn that in a society that inherently prevents us from ever belonging to it or to one another, we have no hope of belonging to ourselves.
So how do we survive, how do we attain a lasting sense of belonging and meaning which is unconditional, in a world where we are continually conditioned into judging ourselves in terms of output and our benefit to others? Firstly, we commit to appreciating the value of our self-expression, our creativity, our contribution – whether these things are economically profitable or not. We are worthy, whether society recognises the value of us and our work or not. Education systems and schools must reflect this too; this message must become integral to our upbringings and our culture because it is integral to the welfare of all humanity. Perhaps more importantly, we must make a personal commitment to viewing every individual in our society as first and foremost that, an individual – a person, who has no obligation to pursue certain ends or to have certain characteristics for the benefit of others. We teach others they can belong by being unconditional in our offer of love. We must not bring others into our lives, or disregard them, solely on the basis of how much value they add to our experiences or how happy they make us. People are not a means to an end. We must ask others what they love to do or aspire to do before we ask what their jobs are, their marital status or where they live.
As we offer compassion to all those we meet, as we embrace others and value them irrespective of whether they benefit our lives or not, we can learn to love ourselves with equal honesty and sincerity. When we do this repeatedly, a great bliss can overcome us. What becomes paramount is a sense of belonging to ourselves and to part of the collective humanity that believes in simple pleasures, health, balance and goodness, rather than a nation indulging in the relentless and ultimately dissatisfying pursuit of continual self-improvement and growth.